In Need of Answers

October 17, 2008 at 1:28 am 4 comments

This is dedicated to a very treasured & dear companion – As-syifa’ul Qalbi. Here goes:

I am hinting,
Can anyone hear my thoughts?

This restlessness that stirs the heart;
which sins of mine had caused it?
Was it the lie I told my mum
to avoid doing housework?
Was it the words that I had said
that hurt the ones close to me?
Was it the past I’ve tried to hide
from everyone who knows me?

I am speaking,
Can anyone hear my words?

This sleeplessness that keeps me awake at night;
which sins of mine had caused it?
Did I hurt His servant unknowingly
by not giving them their right?
Was it the way I spent my youth
with heedlessness & fleshly delights?
Did my repentance fall short of forgiveness?
Could someone shed some light?

I am calling out,
Can anyone hear my pleas?

The sweetness of faith that eludes me;
which sins of mine had caused it?
Is it my laziness in doing good deeds
or the pride that hides in my heart?
Is it the frown I greeted a friend with
or my half-hearted acts of worship?
So many possibilities, so many sins,
How will I ever find out?

I am screaming,
Can anyone hear my screams?

The hard-heartedness & lack of tears;
which sins of mine had caused it?
The worldly gifts I have with me,
is it His sign of *istidraj?
Is His Wrath hiding behind the surface
of which I have no access?
His unending blessings upon me
Is it a reward or is this all a test?


*Note: Istidraj is when Allah SWT gives fortunes to someone whereby Allah SWT is not pleased with him. This is what’s called istidraj.

The Prophet SAW said :”When you see Allah SWT gives good fortunes to His slaves who are always committing sins (disobedient), know that the person is being given istidraj by Allah SWT.” (At-Tabrani, Ahmad and Al-Baihaqi)

However, those disobedient people who keep on committing sins are clueless. They think that they received the fortunes because Allah SWT is with them and they feel that Allah SWT is kind to them in spite of their wrongdoings.


Entry filed under: Allah SWT, hadith, istidraj, myself, poetry, Posts, Prophet SAW.

Submission to Allah’s Will Announcements

4 Comments Add your own

  • 1. shafiqa  |  October 17, 2008 at 12:49 pm

    Assalamualaikum wr wb sister,

    Thanks for the poem. It strikes the right notes with me now.

    Did you come up with this yourself?

    Does ‘istidraj’ also mean incurring wrath of Allah swt? And the signs are receiving good fortunes from Him?
    Hmmm… Astaghfirullah hal’azeem

  • 2. alfaqeer  |  October 17, 2008 at 1:24 pm

    shafiqa: Waalaikumsalam wr wb. Yes I came up with it myself. Yes I guess you could say its His Wrath because surely, He’s unhappy with the state of that person.

    I know, pretty creepy right? May Allah save us from that!

  • 3. Redwan Ahmed  |  October 19, 2008 at 1:28 am

    Assalamu Alaykum,

    Ma’shallah, I love this poem, it is inspiring and awesome sis. May Allah Bless You…Ameen


  • 4. maji6  |  October 20, 2008 at 6:29 pm

    Nice reminder

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